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Declarations of War

Submitted by Roanman on Thu, 06/10/2010 - 15:00

 

Sometimes, I deliberately forget to take my medicine before I go to bed, knowing full well that I will come wide awake between 3:05 and 3:15 AM

Back in the day, I used to wake up making deals, deal making being one of the things I do for a living.

Now days, I usually wake up free of a thought.

I like it.

To my way of thinking, my head empty of noise is a good thing.

So having failed to take my medication last night I came wide awake at precisely 3:12 AM as expected.

Only this time, I was thinking about War.

War with Iran feels inevitable to me.

Paranoid Roany is pretty damn sure that "The Powers That Be" are goading Israel into a war with Iran that's gonna blow up into an ungodly horror in an effort to change the subject away from the absolutely criminal job they've done on our economy.

Evil Roany is pretty sure there's a mess of those Iranian assholes that need killing anyway.

Good Roany on the other hand ........ is uhhhmm ........ well ........ Good Roany ........ you know ...... is pretty much in agreement with Evil Roany on this one.

Which brings me to my point.

In the past, if we were mad at somebody, we'd declare war on the whole damn country.

We declared war on Germany (twice), Japan, I'm pretty sure we declared war on Italy.

Korea was a little different.

That was a "Police Action".

It was authorized by the United Nations Security Council.

Basically, everybody was still sick of war after two "World Wars" so ......... they called it something different.

Same basic theory as "Liberal" and "Progressive".

Vietnam was also different in that it was authorized by "The Gulf of Tonkin Resolution" which was not a formal declaration of war, but rather provided then President Lindon Johnson with the authority to do whatever was necessary including the use of military force to assist any member or protocol state of the Southeast Asia Collective Defense Treaty (in this case South Vietnam) without a formal declaration of war.

Close enough for government work.

The "Joint Resolution to Authorize the Use of United States Armed Forces Pursuant to United Nations Security Council Resolution 678" authorized "The Gulf War".

The "Authorization for Use of Military Force Against Terrorists" got us started in Afghanistan.

Congress authorized the present war in Iraq with the "Iraq War Resolution (formally the Authorization for Use of Military Force Against Iraq Resolution of 2002)".

Ok, so here's my thought.

I don't want to have a war with Iran.

Sure, there's a bunch of guys over there I'd like see dead, and would even cheerfully chip in toward their demise.

But I kind of like a lot of the Iranian people.

I'm on their side, I don't want to hurt em.

Hell, I think a lot of them are heroes.

So, instead of naming the damn thing something that's gonna drag a lot of people that I like into a mess they don't need, like "The resolution to get nuclear weapons the hell out of Iran".

Why not just declare war on the assholes?

Leave the Iranian people out of it.

So, if it's me, I'm naming it "The resolution to kill deader'n Hell; Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, Mullah Ali Khamenei, the entire Iranian Parliament, the couple hundred pricks still around who attacked our embassy, and anyone else dumb enough to want to attempt to defend the above named assholes.  After which we'll be as gone as Keyser Soze and wishing the rest of you (and your children) long, healthy and happy lives."

I know it's long, but it is beautiful in it's precision.

Here's where the beauty resides.

Let's just for fun pretend we're Iranian citizens.  And the word gets out that The United States of America has just declared war on us.

Ahmadinejad is all over the TV about how we must defend our country against the American invaders.  This is scary stuff, and because we're scared, we're getting real damn mad.  Our hearts are in our throats as we prepare to defend our families, our wives, our children, our selves, our country.

Then the word gets out.

The Americans aren't coming after us, they're coming after that dickhead Ahmadinejad.

Aahhhhhhh!!!!

This changes everything.

Now, instead of being scared and madder'n Hell, we're starting to channel Tonto,

"What do you mean we, white man?"

Now, instead of oiling up the AK-47 and running off to some damn barricade to fight, we're oiling up the AK-47 but staying home, just in case one of the assholes decides they want to hide under our bed.

I like to think that (if I thought I could get away with it), I'd pop a cap or two in one of the bastard's asses myself, if only to save a little time.

People should listen to their Uncle Roany.

I got answers.

 

Rest in peace my friend

Submitted by Roanman on Mon, 03/22/2010 - 08:40

 

Obituaries suck.

They pretty much have to.

Who the hell has the time to give a rat's ass about some other guy's friend?

What newspaper has the column inches to give anyway? 

The man below, you couldn't do justice to in ten thousand words.

The final issue here has to do with the fact that he wouldn't want it anyway.

Gerhard preferred to "keep things quiet".

So, I'll say this much and then leave it alone.

One of the two or three most honorable men I've ever known.

 

 

Gerhard Stadler Sr.

November 10, 1927 - March 19, 2010

 

Gerhard Stadler, Sr., beloved husband of Isabella (nee Baumgartner). Loving father of Katharina (Werner) Linder, Gerhard Jr. and Dr. Frank (Dr. Marcia Lu). Cherished grandfather of Alexander Linder; Christian, Nicholaus and Isabella Stadler. Gerhard worked at the First National Bank of Chicago for 30 years where he became Vice President. As a world renowed expert of precious metals, he began the Precious Metals Department. He later continued his expertise as Vice President of LaSalle National Bank. For the past 15 years, he owned and operated Water Tower Precious Metals at Lakeside Bank.

 

Rest in peace my friend.

 

Reading on a Saturday Morning

Submitted by Roanman on Sat, 01/30/2010 - 09:49

 

First of all, some of you people need to stop yelling at me.

Especially the few of you race baiting, neocon, tea party, birther goofs with the well earned inferiority complexes, ... ... ... ... ... ... and my telephone number.

You know who you are !!!

 

I'm on it.

The stuff has been coming fast and furious, I will have read every word by Saturday night, and will be analyzing, cutting, pasting and writing as though I have no real work, career, or even prospects, immediately thereafter.

Which is sort of the case anyway if you stop and think about it. 

You have my word of honor.

And finally, the fact that you happen to be a race baiting, neocon, tea party, birther goof does not in any way diminish the affection that I feel for you.

 This also goes for you thin skinned, unforgiving, left wing twits.

 

As evidence of my enduring fondness for you, I call to your attention the fact that I do have Caller ID, yet I continue to pick up ........... you know, ............... well over half the time.

 

An Editorial Comment

Submitted by Roanman on Thu, 01/07/2010 - 06:59

 

Were I President of the United States of America.

And, I had in my possession a foreign national who had just attempted to murder three hundred or so innocent people on an airplane over the city of Detroit, Michigan, and some other number of hundreds on the ground below.

And, I believed that this individual had information that might enable me to save the life of just one American citizen.

I would personally flick my Bic underneath that bastard's testicles.

And, after a few minutes when the crying and puking let up a little, I'd ask just one question,

"Son, is there anything at all you can think of right now, that I might like to know?"

"Take your time."

"I got all day."

 

Does this make me a bad person?

Reflecting .................... Reflecting .................... Still Reflecting .................... Done

Don't care.

  

To quote the Roanman

Submitted by Roanman on Thu, 12/03/2009 - 07:47

 

                                                                                    

                     

                                        

  

Carmel Egan, www.TheAge.com.au
 
 

 

What's Going On Here?

Submitted by Roanman on Fri, 10/17/2008 - 09:20

 

Well, pretty much .... Just Thinking.

The truth is, I've got some time on my hands, so I started wandering around the net in an effort to figure out who is doing what, to whom.

We have all talked about, and marveled at the sheer volume of stuff available "out there".

It goes beyond imagination.

It is however, my strongly held opinion, that much of what's available goes unaccessed, and the small part of that which is accessed, mostly goes unread.

 People are busy.

Probably busier than people have ever been in the history of mankind.

Not many of us have the time to go wandering around out there trying to figure out what to think about stuff.

That's issue #1.

Issue #2 is more insidious.

We all feel the way we feel.

Damn few of us care to think about what we think.

 Feeling is easier, and a lot less time consuming.

Feeling is however, a lot harder on the nervous system.

At least I think it is.

I'm feeling a lot of stress out there. And strain.

Anger and fear are prevalent.

Constructive approaches are in retreat.

As for the blogosphere.

You know as well as I do that much of what's out there amounts to little more than a petulant rant.

So, what's going on here?

Just some stuff to think about.

If I were you, knowing what I know,

I'd start with the quotes.

But it really doesn't matter.

The gears might link to anything, sometimes it'll make sense, sometimes it won't, at least to you.

Occasionally, it doesn't even make sense to me.

I'm Just Thinking.

Try it. You might like it.

Might make you feel better.

 

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